Long Haired Freaky Gnomes
Rush, early E.L.O., Floyd, The Mars Volta, Genesis and even…gulp…The Alan Parsons Project! I fear I’ve gone too far down the progressive rabbit hole this time and fear I shan’t be returning anytime soon.
The last time this happened I started using words like “thou” , “my lord” and “pantaloon” in every day conversations and even had a hankering to attend, nay PARTICIPATE, in a Renaissance Festival.
I couldn’t concentrate at work. I started doodling unicorns and elves on my budget excel spreadsheets before turning them into my Director for approval. I started referring to my office as my ‘Manor’ and forced my employees to address me as ‘Sir Chickweed’. I refused to eat with utensils and brought only large drumsticks for lunches. My attire consisted only of tunics, capes and surcoats.
I almost pawned my wedding band for a double necked bass guitar, for Chrissakes!!
Does anybody reading have the antidote for this affliction? Don’t let me get to the point where I learn to play the pan flute.
Please help as soon as you can or I shall force myself into a pillory as punishment for my unholy aural crimes!
Right after I pay a visit to the privy, of course